We have a heartbeat!

I had my ultrasound this morning, and it went great! We immediately saw Baby B. and got to see and hear the heartbeat! The heart was beating at a very healthy 161 beats per minute. To see that tiny little heart beating inside of me is something that I will absolutely never forget.

They pushed my due date back a bit, so I am now officially 7 weeks and 4 days, with a due date of 3/13/11. I couldn’t be more thrilled with how it went today–I’ve never felt such an overwhelming surge of relief in my life.

Thanks so much to everyone who has us in your thoughts and prayers! It meant the world to me. Now, hoping for smooth sailing the rest of the pregnancy (a girl can dream, right!?).

Also, I have a new post up over on the ACT1 site today. Check it out if you have some time! Hopefully it will make you smile :)

Sick as a dog, happy as a clam

The past two days have brought on major "morning" sickness – I’ve only been able to keep about a third of my meals down, and I feel queasy all day and night. Last week, I was feeling nauseous as well, although not really getting sick to my stomach, so it seems that things are moving forward. If I weren’t so thrilled that I’m showing some signs of a healthy pregnancy, I’d be miserable!

The first time I got sick I went to tell my husband, and I couldn’t help but break out in a huge smile. It was a bizarre reaction, I know, but right now I’m clinging to any sign that Baby B. is ok in there. It’s been an excruciatingly long wait since my last ultrasound, but now I only have to get through one more full day before I hopefully get some good news on Thursday.

So, for now, I’ll keep getting excited every time I’m sick, which by the looks of it, means I’ll have a lot of excitement in the next couple of days! :)

ACT1 Blogging and My 13th Diaversary

I am very excited to announce that I'll be adding my voice to the ACT1 blog each Thursday.  My first post is up, and talks about this year being my first time recognizing my diaversary, despite that fact that I've had diabetes for 13 years.

ACT1 is a group of Type 1 diabetics who see a lack of service geared towards adults with Type 1 Diabetes. Through support group meetings, partnerships, volunteerism and advocacy ACT1 strives to attend to the most vulnerable populations within the community with the understanding that all diabetics are equally deserving of quality care.

I have been attending the ACT1 support group for young women for about six months now, and it has made a huge impact on how I feel about my life with diabetes.  I had never been close to any other type 1's before, especially not anywhere other than online, so I felt truly at home the first time I walked into one of these meetings.  It's a wonderful group of women that I feel lucky to have in my life!

Make sure to check out the other bloggers on the site - there's a great variety of bloggers who all share their different points of view on life with diabetes.

Thinking positive thoughts...

First, I want to say thank you to everyone who left such sweet notes of congratulations on my last post.  I  truly appreciate all of your kind works!

I've been avoiding writing since then because after our initial excitement, we got a little bit of scary, although not necessarily bad, news.  We went for the first ultrasound last week and all they saw was an empty gestational sac.  Since by my calculations I thought I was 6.5 weeks at the time, this was an upsetting image to see.  We thought by this time we might have had a shot at seeing the heartbeat.  The doctor explained that I could very likely just be earlier than I thought, which would explain why my HCG levels were also low when first tested, although there is a chance that the reason we only saw the gestation sac could be because the pregnancy may not be viable.  Luckily, my HCG number continues to rise, so that is a good sign!  But, the first time I explained what happened out loud to my dad, I couldn't help but cry.  It was hard to talk about it out loud to anyone, and that night when my husband got home from work, I melted into a puddle of helpless tears.

I will go back late next week for another ultrasound, so until then, all we can do it wait, and think positive thoughts.  My husband and I have such wonderful family and close friends who are all praying and thinking positively, so Baby B. has a lot of people pulling for him/her!

It's been an emotional roller coaster since the ultrasound.  At first, I was so teary and couldn't think about anything else.  We were so lucky to get pregnant so quickly, that I suppose a little waiting won't kill us--although I must say, I'm not sure I've ever felt such insatiable stress in my life.  I already love this baby so much, that it's devastating to imagine what it will mean if the pregnancy isn't viable. I hope and pray that I won't need to go down that path, and for now, I am just trying to take care of myself as best I can.

During this horrible wait, I must say that the online community has been such a valuable tool.  Sites like Diabetic Mommy, The Bump and Baby Center are all full of other women who are always willing to share their stories and advice.  I cling to every story I hear of women who have been through similar situations and turned out to have healthy pregnancies (I also value the non-success stories because they help me manage my expectations, even though they are difficult to read). It makes me feel very lucky to be going through this pregnancy at a time when there is so much information available almost instantaneously, and the women on these sites have helped me to have a much more positive outlook this week!

So fingers crossed, everyone, and I'll be sure to keep you updated!

Sweet Child of Mine

Sweet Child of Mine,

Even though your dad and I have been planning for you for what seems like a very long time, you still managed to surprise us with your quick arrival into our lives (I wonder what that says about your personality…)! Although you are still very delicate at 6 weeks and just beginning your journey, you are very much loved and are already such a huge part of our lives. I promise to do everything I can over the next eight months or so to take good care of you, and to give you the very best start in life that you could have. I know there will be times that will be tough, but I need you to be strong, and for us to work together until I can hold you in my arms.

You should know that I love you with every ounce of my body and that I am so excited to see who you are going to become. You should know that every time I mention you, your dad’s face lights up and he can’t help but grin from ear to ear. You should know that those who are closest to us can’t wait to meet you, and that you are already the apple of your grandparents’ eyes. And you should know that while your dad and I are sometimes scared and not sure that we’ll always know the best way to care for you, we’ll do everything in our power to make sure you are always safe and loved—the rest, we’ll figure out as we go!

So take your time, little one, and I hope you’re safe and comfy in there! While I know this is a fragile time for you, I have faith that you’ll be here before we know it. As I said, be strong, because we already love you so much and can’t wait to meet you!  I wish I could somehow communicate with you, but for now, my letters to you will have to do.

With all my love,
Mommy

New A1C results are in!

My endo apt. got moved up a week so I went this morning to have my A1C tested, and it came back at 5.7! I was so excited I could hardly stand it. A year ago I never even knew under 6 was possible. While the number is great, my endo said he’d rather have it hover closer to 6 if that means going low less often, so we’ll see how I do with that in the next few months, but for now, I’m ecstatic. It’s nice to know that all of the testing I’ve been doing hasn’t been in vain. It’s hard to explain why there is so much emotion that comes with this one test result, but I’ve felt my fair share of guilt after “bad” readings, so I’m not holding back the excitement for a “good” result!

I also absolutely love going to the Naomi Diabetes Center—it is such a welcome change from other practices I’ve been to before. Everything is clean, fairly high tech (on-site A1C testing rates high with me), and the staff and docs are all wonderful, understanding, and seem to truly care about the patients. My endo even asked how work is going and how my husband is doing, which caught me a bit off guard—my first thought was, why do you care? Then I realized he was just taking an interest in me as a person with diabetes, and not just as a diabetic. What a refreshing change!

Ping!

In a somewhat rash decision, I decided last week that I really wanted to upgrade my Animas 2020 pump to Ping and I'm very excited because it arrived yesterday! I've only been using it since last night, but I LOVE the remote/tester. I tend to wear my pump under wraps, either on my leg or under a Spanx-like undergarment so I can wear dresses, so the remote feature is HUGE for me. Now I don't have to wrestle my pump out from hiding in restaurants, during meetings, etc. I'll try to give a better review once I have a little more time with it, but my initial reaction is definitely positive.  Plus, the name Ping is just so much fun :)

Italy pictures!

Before I run out of work for the long holiday weekend, I thought I'd finally post a couple of pics from our trip to Italy!

Here we are at Trevi Fountain, one of my favorite places that we visited.  It's very romantic and people go there to throw pennies in the fountain as that is supposed to ensure a trip back to Rome (I also threw in another wish for good measure - bet you can't guess what I wished for!).  While we there a couple got engaged and the whole crowd erupted in cheers.  It was a really great experience!

And, here we are in front of the Vatican.  Such tourists!

If you want to see even more pictures from our trip, check them out here.

Hope everyone has a great 4th of July (for those in the states)!